All this political ridiculousness has got me thinking. I’ve gotten VERY JUDGEY in the last year with regards to politicians and all their talky-talk. You need to have a little pity for me with this because I live in Iowa, which means we were getting mailers, phone calls, and television ads voiced over by men … Continue reading “Say What You Mean (Kind of)”

Readers. Friends. Countrymen and women. Lend me your ear and let’s chat about youth sports. Youth sports. THE LAND OF THE INSANE. Marc and I are receiving an education this fall in youth sports. Up until this time, for the first fourteen years of our parenting life, we have been entirely naive. We have done … Continue reading “In defense of parents who aren’t insane”

We are in show choir season around here. You heard me. Show choir season. Kind of like lacrosse season or volleyball season only with lots of sparkles and jazz hands. I used to be in show choir, before the turn of the century. I loved it. We sang, we danced, we ratted our hair, we … Continue reading “Show Choir: No, we’re not kidding.”

Let’s talk about Prince. He was a genius. Also, the hair.  (Please note: This is Prince’s most recent passport photo. MY most recent passport photo was taken when I was pregnant. I’m so happy I get to use it for a decade!) But Prince. And the high heels. And the fact that for awhile he … Continue reading “Prince”

A thousand years ago, when I was young and carefree, I used to watch movies. Moving pictures, as we called them. It was a grand time, a glamorous time, a time when I could eat an entire bag of Cheetos and not feel anything but happiness. It was a time when I could sleep in … Continue reading “Oscars Viewing Guide”

Hello, dear people. Despite all those Internet rumors, I didn’t die. Wait–that rumor was about Johnny Depp. He isn’t dead either, though he is against showing his teeth in photographs. I, however, am not! Listen, I’ve missed you people. I’m sorry for my long absence, but I have found I cannot multi-task. That’s not true: … Continue reading “Happy Christmas 2013!”

Have you people heard about this woman? Her name is Diana Nyad. I first knew of her after I read a fascinating article about her in The New York Times a couple years back. Miss Diana is now 64 years old, and this week, after 35 years of pursuit, she swam from Havana, Cuba, to … Continue reading “Swimming Upstream With Diana Nyad”

School starts in a matter of days. This means a lot of things to a lot of people, but to me, it means my children are all in need of pants. These children of mine all display the Tall Man Gene so dominant in my husband. I am well on my way to being the … Continue reading “Prancercise It”

Can we get an amen and huzzah and nice-bloody-work for this woman? Photo Credits Not only did Kate Middleton-come-Duchess-of-Cambridge become pregnant while the whole world speculated on her ovarian activity, and then carry that pregnancy past her due date while the whole world stalked her, she then birthed the child and had to appear on … Continue reading “Three Cheers for the Cambridge Mama!”

Remember pop music? Yeah, neither do I. But I did watch the Grammy Awards show this year, which made me FEEL like I know pop music. I didn’t exactly recognize 98% of the artists sitting in the crowd in their astonishing fashion choices. I looked for some fashion highlights to post here, but most of … Continue reading “Rocking Out”

Happy Fourth! What a great holiday. No need to shop, unless you include going to the store for brats and the fixings for a root beer float. No pressure on making the best dessert or the loveliest centerpiece. Heck, you don’t even need to shower if you don’t want to. Just jump in a pool, … Continue reading “Oh, Say, Can You See?!? No, Really! Right Over There!”

Yesterday morning, when only fourteen people in the Midwestern time zone were awake, I arrived at the studios of Life 107.1 to substitute on the morning show. I had a blast. And I kept things clean, not one smoke break in sight. Photo credit. I tried looking professional with the big-honker headphones, but I’m pretty … Continue reading “Got the Music in Me”

Because I love you, I have gone ahead and condensed a spring fashion guide right here, right now. You may write me a thank-you note. But please only do so if you are wearing one of these featured ensembles. First we have the ever-beloved crotch pant.   Because we all have great reasons for accentuating that … Continue reading “Spring Fashion 2013”

Well, people, the transformation is complete. I am officially completely out of it. There was a time when I had seen all of the movies up for Best Picture at the Oscars. In fact, our best friends used to throw an Oscar party where folks would dress up in costumes reflecting their pick for best … Continue reading “Oscar Who?”

Did you watch the Golden Globes? Yeah, me neither. I had good intentions and I think Amy P. and Tina Fey are hi-larious, but I get so distracted so easily and I think that night I cleaned out my shoe rack. Turns out, the Birkenstocks I bought in the mid-nineties really AREN’T coming back in … Continue reading “Reasons I’m Not Famous”

Sleigh bells ring. Are you listening? Well, of course you are not because all you can hear is janky Christmas music blaring out the radio, the mall sound system, and the tinny speakers in elevators. Sleigh bells can’t possibly compete. So can we talk a bit about some GOOD Christmas music? It does exist, and … Continue reading “Tinsel Tunes”

I can’t even pretend to be unbiased. Photo source. Shawn John should have won. What? Am I the only one still watching DWTS, other than Tom Bergeron’s wife? Listen, I swore it off years ago when my five-year-old started asking me about procreation during Rumba week. But then Shawn Johnson was on the All-Star season … Continue reading “Shawn Johnson and DWTS: A Lament”