Signed, Sealed, Delivered!

It’s here! It’s here! No, no, no, not another baby. One uterus can only take so much, people. I’m talking about STRETCH MARKS! My fourth novel! The title based completely on second-hand information as I certainly know nothing of the sort! I’m looking to set a blog record for most exclamation points used per entry! How am I doing!

Yesterday, the sweet FedEx man brought my book to the front door and I found it difficult to keep from weeping. The better part of two years was spent on the creation of this puppy, so it was simply lovely to see the finished product face to face. I called Marc, who was enthusiastic and supportive, continuing his run as best-spouse-to-an-unstable-author. And then I called my parents. I realize I’m 33, but God-love-me, I still want to share my joys and sorrows with my mom and dad. Dad asked me to reserve a copy for him, and he’ll probably try to pay me for it. Mom squealed, breathless, and said she’d be right over.

This book, like all that I’ve written, is really an outgrowth of their kindness. Dad bought me my first laptop, taking me seriously as a writer when I had not one word to show for it and not one penny to devote to the craft. Mom forced me on an airplane in 2005, clucking about how brilliant I was and that famous literary people would be THRILLED to meet me at that writers’ conference. So when Mom came over yesterday, we both cried a bit. She knows what it means to finish the book amid three children, a busy house, annoying fits of perfectionism, endless distractions, nagging addictions to chocolate and sleep. She takes care of my kids on short notice, not minding that I have greasy hair and haven’t exactly brushed my teeth that particular morning. She, too, is a reader, a girl who loves a good story, and she, too, likes the feel of a new book in hand. That her daughter wrote the book is just too much. So she cried, we cried, we thanked God for His immeasurable gifts of grace, and then we asked Ana to take this photo:

Admittedly, we look a bit wonky because it took about 16 minutes for Ana to actually press the button and by then, our facial muscles were twitching. Also, the angle of the camera had us convinced Ana was photographing our navels, so we kept scrunching our bodies lower and lower toward the floor. Turns out, there was little to fear. Our heads, eyebrows, the book—all in the photo.

So STRETCH MARKS is on its way to bookstores even as I type. Might I humbly ask that you consider buying it? I think you’ll really like it! Here come more exclamation points! And it’s stinking cheap! Just a smidge over ten dollars today on Amazon! Cheaper than a movie ticket and it can sit pretty on your shelf forever, way past your buttered popcorn and Twizzlers! Buy it, like it, and spread the word to other people who like stories that are sometimes funny, sometimes poignant, always a kick in the pants! Thanks for reading! Thanks, Mom and Dad! It’s here!

p.s. Stay tuned. Lots of book fun, freebies, and embarrassing PR moves in the weeks ahead….